1. Jon Stewart is only a journalist if he wants to be. The title given to people who find the news can only be used if the news finder, itself descides to use it.
2. People may be confused by the fact that he delivers the facts of the days new in a palletable fashion, opposed to the bitter taste of the Situation room.
3. It has everything CNN has.....that it minus the 24hour bit, the holograms, beards and overly serious attitude.
4. Just watch any of thier cover of "Fox and Friends" and you will understand.
COBRA COMMANDER
Friday, April 23, 2010
Friday, April 9, 2010
4 Posts Down and Nothing Left to Say
Really, I have no idea what to blog about.
Twenty minutes until everything is due and I can feel the cold clutches of procrastination moving in. Part of me says "why not, its only one less post than you are supposed to have done, your grade can't be hurt that badly?" but there still is that other part of me yelling "TYPE DAMNIT TYPE!" Its hard to decide between the two and I guess that typing about nothing is a decent compromise. Pete is currently listening to his Ipod so loudly I can hear it across the room and after four years of him doing that I can definitely say that I don't like his music tastes. Cara is probably browsing some trendy, music related websites while the new kid to the class who's name I do not know is texting. Glenn is MIA, Shane is absent and Tony is recuperating somewhere. The other people in the class are as quite as usually only making the clacking sound of keys being frantically press in an effort to meet the deadline. As Porky the Pig would say "That's all folks", I am now done blogging.
Twenty minutes until everything is due and I can feel the cold clutches of procrastination moving in. Part of me says "why not, its only one less post than you are supposed to have done, your grade can't be hurt that badly?" but there still is that other part of me yelling "TYPE DAMNIT TYPE!" Its hard to decide between the two and I guess that typing about nothing is a decent compromise. Pete is currently listening to his Ipod so loudly I can hear it across the room and after four years of him doing that I can definitely say that I don't like his music tastes. Cara is probably browsing some trendy, music related websites while the new kid to the class who's name I do not know is texting. Glenn is MIA, Shane is absent and Tony is recuperating somewhere. The other people in the class are as quite as usually only making the clacking sound of keys being frantically press in an effort to meet the deadline. As Porky the Pig would say "That's all folks", I am now done blogging.
Response: scaryduck
Not scary, just a duck.
"Being in the main an account of the remarkable and varied exploits of Scaryduck: Genius, gentleman explorer, French cabaret chantoose and small bets placed.A riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma, stuffed up a dog's bottom" does a pretty good job explain just what this blog is and yes I am probably just as confused as your are. It's nerdy, silly, funny and sometimes a bit disturbing but does a decent job closing out the segment of this blog where I have to respond to other ones.
"Being in the main an account of the remarkable and varied exploits of Scaryduck: Genius, gentleman explorer, French cabaret chantoose and small bets placed.A riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma, stuffed up a dog's bottom" does a pretty good job explain just what this blog is and yes I am probably just as confused as your are. It's nerdy, silly, funny and sometimes a bit disturbing but does a decent job closing out the segment of this blog where I have to respond to other ones.
Response to Best Blogs Ever
I wouldn't call you THE best blog ever but for the next few days, enjoy the title. The blog, managed by Shannon Paul, a communications manager at http://www.peak6.com/ Peak6, a PR and marketing strategies company that specializes in social networking, will probably come across as interesting to me and me only. She posts various Internet review including new tech blogs, networking trends and the "run away from the camera guy." Her commentary is sharp, witty along with being insightful to what the Internet may yield.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Time to Type About Suits
Its not that I want to be The Man in The Grey Flannel Suit, its just that I want to own a grey flannel suit. I almost have one, I have a grey linen suit from H&M (for about 80 bucks) and its pretty dandy.
I don't quite remember when I got fascinated by formal wear but the hours of Internet window shopping and GQ archives have left me with more knowledge of suits than the salesman at most department stores. And at today's count I own three of suits (soon to be four): 1 three piece pinstripe with very odd lapels (hand me down from my uncle that fits surprisingly well), 1 two piece pinstripe (also from the same uncle but much lighter and classically styled than the first), my grey two button linen as previously mentioned and soon enough a navy, Calvin Klein that I can turn to when the weather gets too cold for the linen suit. Finding suits has been a bit of a difficulty for me because of my odd sizing. I am just barley short enough to wear a regular in most suits
I don't quite remember when I got fascinated by formal wear but the hours of Internet window shopping and GQ archives have left me with more knowledge of suits than the salesman at most department stores. And at today's count I own three of suits (soon to be four): 1 three piece pinstripe with very odd lapels (hand me down from my uncle that fits surprisingly well), 1 two piece pinstripe (also from the same uncle but much lighter and classically styled than the first), my grey two button linen as previously mentioned and soon enough a navy, Calvin Klein that I can turn to when the weather gets too cold for the linen suit. Finding suits has been a bit of a difficulty for me because of my odd sizing. I am just barley short enough to wear a regular in most suits
and at 35 inches around, too big and tall for boy's suits and too thin for most men's. Luckily, today's styles have brought about the slim fitted 36 regular which fits like a dream. My H&M suit was taken right off the rack with only minor alterations to the pants. Another blessing from today's trends comes from the thin Mad Men inspired ties that are considered cool now. A trend for most people but a short cut for decent proportions for someone as narrow as me (normal width ties end up looking way to wide on a thin guy.)
Sometimes when going to purchase something, I get a slight feeling that although it will look good today, 6 years from now someone could see it and go "Oh, you got that in 2010." I do my best to banish those thoughts and focus only on accommodating my 8.50 an hour budget knowing that as of today, the men's style world is meant for people like me.
-COBRA COMMANDER
Sometimes when going to purchase something, I get a slight feeling that although it will look good today, 6 years from now someone could see it and go "Oh, you got that in 2010." I do my best to banish those thoughts and focus only on accommodating my 8.50 an hour budget knowing that as of today, the men's style world is meant for people like me.
-COBRA COMMANDER
The H&M was pretty much this suit (pictured above) but
lighter in color......and not Brooks Brothers
lighter in color......and not Brooks Brothers
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Its Time for You to Decide, Internet
May 1st is weeks away and hey, guess what? I don't quite know where I should go next year!!! After applying to anywhere that I could get a family member to give me money to cover the applications fees (I had no business applying to BU and Emerson College but what the hell, 65 bucks is 65 bucks) I managed to get into 6 places. Of those six, there were really just two that I am actually interested in ( the rest were just places that various uncles and aunts either went to or wish they went to) and those two being Temple University of Philadelphia and Pace University's Manhattan campus both offer completely different Advertising programs. And to help YOU the Internet in my decision making process, I will provide a nice little blurb on each school.
Starting with PACE, the first one to send the letter and the only one so far to offer any kind of money (money is very good when you're a ward of the state and 12 grand a year is more than I am capable of raising on my own.) And the Lubin School of business has been showing me all the grand old success stories they can in the weekly email I get from them (mostly CPAs which are not in my in my field and frankly I am getting sick of their letter head) but other outlets of the internet have shown that graduates of their program have made their way to promising places. Also there was the "Pace Preview" which introduced me to Conrad, the adjunct Ad professor who did a pretty damned good job selling the school that pays for his day glow palsy pocket squares. And Kevin. Did I mention Kevin the soon to be acting student who was the only person in the room that I was watching the Oscars in with any knowledge of film and he as dwarfism and a funny accent. Call me immature but that would make a damned good roommate. Somewhere in there is also the free tickets to Inside The Actor's Studio, close proximity to ALMOST EVERY MAJOR AD AGENCY EVER (or at least in NY.) The downside to all of this is probably the most important thing of them all, their program. At Pace, I will be majoring in Marketing with an emphasis in Advertising and what not, this may be a safer option (according to the occupational genius that my mother believes she is) but denies me in the most part of the copy writing boot camp that I desire.
Then along came Temple, the first school that I looked at, the Alma Mater of Bill Cosby and to
put the pop in the pudding, they offer an extremely extensive dessert bar including pudding. That was a horrible pudding pop pun but I don't feel like deleting it right now. To get back to business, Temple is located in a city, not home to giant agencies like BBDO or the legendary Ogilvy Mathers and Wu Tang, etc. but to small boutique agencies that are not only growing in popularity but also tend to provide a good foundation for resumes and careers. Temple offers an actual Advertising major with emphasis in different parts of the field (accounts, copywriting and art) with flexibility to move between the different areas. Being that I fixed my application and received their acceptance letter during the recent break, no word of financial aid or scholarships have reached me yet so I'm going to mark down a "N/A" for that field. Philadelphia also offers the whole not being New York thing. Not that I have anything against the city, but I have this slight fear of spending so much time in New York that it might become boring to me. Next week I plan on going to Temple and visiting the Ad department to get a decent glimpse at what it may hold.
Until then, feel free to make my life decisions for me because frankly I just want to take a nap.
-COBRA COMMANDER
http://www.pace.edu/academic_psearch/display_program.cfm?School=BUS&Cred=BBA&Maj=MA4&Location=NYC
http://www.temple.edu/sct/advertising/
Starting with PACE, the first one to send the letter and the only one so far to offer any kind of money (money is very good when you're a ward of the state and 12 grand a year is more than I am capable of raising on my own.) And the Lubin School of business has been showing me all the grand old success stories they can in the weekly email I get from them (mostly CPAs which are not in my in my field and frankly I am getting sick of their letter head) but other outlets of the internet have shown that graduates of their program have made their way to promising places. Also there was the "Pace Preview" which introduced me to Conrad, the adjunct Ad professor who did a pretty damned good job selling the school that pays for his day glow palsy pocket squares. And Kevin. Did I mention Kevin the soon to be acting student who was the only person in the room that I was watching the Oscars in with any knowledge of film and he as dwarfism and a funny accent. Call me immature but that would make a damned good roommate. Somewhere in there is also the free tickets to Inside The Actor's Studio, close proximity to ALMOST EVERY MAJOR AD AGENCY EVER (or at least in NY.) The downside to all of this is probably the most important thing of them all, their program. At Pace, I will be majoring in Marketing with an emphasis in Advertising and what not, this may be a safer option (according to the occupational genius that my mother believes she is) but denies me in the most part of the copy writing boot camp that I desire.Then along came Temple, the first school that I looked at, the Alma Mater of Bill Cosby and to
put the pop in the pudding, they offer an extremely extensive dessert bar including pudding. That was a horrible pudding pop pun but I don't feel like deleting it right now. To get back to business, Temple is located in a city, not home to giant agencies like BBDO or the legendary Ogilvy Mathers and Wu Tang, etc. but to small boutique agencies that are not only growing in popularity but also tend to provide a good foundation for resumes and careers. Temple offers an actual Advertising major with emphasis in different parts of the field (accounts, copywriting and art) with flexibility to move between the different areas. Being that I fixed my application and received their acceptance letter during the recent break, no word of financial aid or scholarships have reached me yet so I'm going to mark down a "N/A" for that field. Philadelphia also offers the whole not being New York thing. Not that I have anything against the city, but I have this slight fear of spending so much time in New York that it might become boring to me. Next week I plan on going to Temple and visiting the Ad department to get a decent glimpse at what it may hold.Until then, feel free to make my life decisions for me because frankly I just want to take a nap.
-COBRA COMMANDER
http://www.pace.edu/academic_psearch/display_program.cfm?School=BUS&Cred=BBA&Maj=MA4&Location=NYC
http://www.temple.edu/sct/advertising/
Friday, March 26, 2010
For those of you working at Democratic Congressman's offices, please stand away from the windows-Response to Taxdayteaparty
Bricks may be hurdled through them.
Frankly TaxDayTeaParty, I hope bad things happen to you, not necessarily because of your views (although our difference in them is only adding fuel to the fire) but because of your manner of expressing them. I am growing increasingly annoyed with you and your movement because you hide. You hide behind views of nationalism, patriotism, and what ever other 'isms that could be used to decide your illustration of what you think "real Americans" should be. In truth, you are a demagogue, you sensationalize and cause sometimes violent reactions to matters that could best be dealt with through civilized debate. That means no shouting, no showing up with guns at your side, no death threats or throwing of bricks and definitely no showing up in period costume. It makes you look stupid, immature and rather cheesy. Feel free at anytime to speak your voice and explain how I have misjudged you, I will meet you with an open mind but if you continue this populist path then I will pray that you fade into history like most other populist movements. On your homepage, you cry foul at the violent label that you have received but other than hot linking to other right wing blogs you do nothing to change that opinion (your members actually threw an egg at your own bus not long after that post.) Just remember that anger is not an opinion and you are still a minority (a loud one at that) who needs to make a good impression on the rest of us if you want to make it big.
-COBRA COMMANDER
Frankly TaxDayTeaParty, I hope bad things happen to you, not necessarily because of your views (although our difference in them is only adding fuel to the fire) but because of your manner of expressing them. I am growing increasingly annoyed with you and your movement because you hide. You hide behind views of nationalism, patriotism, and what ever other 'isms that could be used to decide your illustration of what you think "real Americans" should be. In truth, you are a demagogue, you sensationalize and cause sometimes violent reactions to matters that could best be dealt with through civilized debate. That means no shouting, no showing up with guns at your side, no death threats or throwing of bricks and definitely no showing up in period costume. It makes you look stupid, immature and rather cheesy. Feel free at anytime to speak your voice and explain how I have misjudged you, I will meet you with an open mind but if you continue this populist path then I will pray that you fade into history like most other populist movements. On your homepage, you cry foul at the violent label that you have received but other than hot linking to other right wing blogs you do nothing to change that opinion (your members actually threw an egg at your own bus not long after that post.) Just remember that anger is not an opinion and you are still a minority (a loud one at that) who needs to make a good impression on the rest of us if you want to make it big.
-COBRA COMMANDER
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
I Met the Situation the Other Night
I met the Situation the other night, it was at my horrible, horrible supermarket job and I have been forever changed by it.
My shift at Acme started as they usually do, I clock in about 4 minutes late, stand at my register, withdrawing into the sanctuary of my deep subconscious and greet customers in what old ladies describe as a "game show host voice." Somewhere in there (I am not sure what time because I try not to look at clocks there, maybe 6:00ish) I looked up from my register while ringing up the last person to see an odd group of people walking in from the rain. I admit it, I scoffed at them, the big one in front was wearing a red, sleeveless hoodie with some sort of dragon design on it and all the rest were a nice combination of in need of a size guide, too much cleavage and the Sunday special at the spray tan place. Then the big guy in the red turned to me. "Hey, you got cigs in this place?" I replied with a "Yeah" and a nod to which he replied with "Alright, gimmie a back of Newports." Normally, the protocol in the Acme is for the customer to go to the Customer Service desk, fully equipped with a giant pipe shaped sign that says "Tobacco" and the manager at the desk will ring them up and hand over the cigarettes. Instead, I turned (as I usually do when the customer is already online when he/she wants smokes) and yelled to the manager to bring me a pack of Newports and while I waited for Alex the manager at the time to find her way down to register 5, I listened to what these odd characters had to say. Finally, Alex made it down to me, handed over the box which I then handed to the guy in red and rung him up for about 7 bucks and some change. He paid with debt, took the smokes, and walked out the door with the gaggle of lackeys following close behind and it was not until that moment when I turned around to make a Guido joke did I notice the slight excitement in every ones eyes. "Do you think that was really him?" Someone asked. Another saying "Why do you think he was up here?" Somewhat disappointed that my window for a joke was gone I asked who they were talking about and customer and employee alike said "You just rang up the Situation." I then did what any suburban high school kid who just met a reality TV star would do and texted anyone and everyone I know who would give a damn but something stuck with me from the experience. No, it wasn't that I touched the Situation's hand, it was the the subject of the conversation he had with his little posse.
They were talking about books, library books at that and were arguing about how long you can keep books out from the library. THE SITUATION READS my twitter update later read and a newly established hope for humanity was kindled with in me.
Prior to this, I noticed that maybe 8 out of every 23 kids in my high school would actually admit to reading the books assigned to us and a smaller 3 out of the same sized class would admit to reading for fun. I myself have been reading the New York Times (at least the A section and the magazine) every weekend morning since the 6th grade and usually go through one book a month (currently a biography of Jacques Cousteau.) Many including myself have deem reading as a dieing art and on many occasions I have suggested to my English teachers to have movies (good movies and not necessarily the film version of what is being read in class) taught side by side with books in order to increase class interest. The fact that this overly tan, muscle bound, bar fight scarred Italian guy from somewhere around here goes to the library made me think that maybe books could make a comeback. After all if you don't like what you are reading, you can always burn it (you cant do that with a Kindle.)
-COBRA COMMANDER
My shift at Acme started as they usually do, I clock in about 4 minutes late, stand at my register, withdrawing into the sanctuary of my deep subconscious and greet customers in what old ladies describe as a "game show host voice." Somewhere in there (I am not sure what time because I try not to look at clocks there, maybe 6:00ish) I looked up from my register while ringing up the last person to see an odd group of people walking in from the rain. I admit it, I scoffed at them, the big one in front was wearing a red, sleeveless hoodie with some sort of dragon design on it and all the rest were a nice combination of in need of a size guide, too much cleavage and the Sunday special at the spray tan place. Then the big guy in the red turned to me. "Hey, you got cigs in this place?" I replied with a "Yeah" and a nod to which he replied with "Alright, gimmie a back of Newports." Normally, the protocol in the Acme is for the customer to go to the Customer Service desk, fully equipped with a giant pipe shaped sign that says "Tobacco" and the manager at the desk will ring them up and hand over the cigarettes. Instead, I turned (as I usually do when the customer is already online when he/she wants smokes) and yelled to the manager to bring me a pack of Newports and while I waited for Alex the manager at the time to find her way down to register 5, I listened to what these odd characters had to say. Finally, Alex made it down to me, handed over the box which I then handed to the guy in red and rung him up for about 7 bucks and some change. He paid with debt, took the smokes, and walked out the door with the gaggle of lackeys following close behind and it was not until that moment when I turned around to make a Guido joke did I notice the slight excitement in every ones eyes. "Do you think that was really him?" Someone asked. Another saying "Why do you think he was up here?" Somewhat disappointed that my window for a joke was gone I asked who they were talking about and customer and employee alike said "You just rang up the Situation." I then did what any suburban high school kid who just met a reality TV star would do and texted anyone and everyone I know who would give a damn but something stuck with me from the experience. No, it wasn't that I touched the Situation's hand, it was the the subject of the conversation he had with his little posse.
They were talking about books, library books at that and were arguing about how long you can keep books out from the library. THE SITUATION READS my twitter update later read and a newly established hope for humanity was kindled with in me.
Prior to this, I noticed that maybe 8 out of every 23 kids in my high school would actually admit to reading the books assigned to us and a smaller 3 out of the same sized class would admit to reading for fun. I myself have been reading the New York Times (at least the A section and the magazine) every weekend morning since the 6th grade and usually go through one book a month (currently a biography of Jacques Cousteau.) Many including myself have deem reading as a dieing art and on many occasions I have suggested to my English teachers to have movies (good movies and not necessarily the film version of what is being read in class) taught side by side with books in order to increase class interest. The fact that this overly tan, muscle bound, bar fight scarred Italian guy from somewhere around here goes to the library made me think that maybe books could make a comeback. After all if you don't like what you are reading, you can always burn it (you cant do that with a Kindle.)
-COBRA COMMANDER
Monday, March 22, 2010
Sir Timothy Berner-Lee must hate himself for this
For those of you who don't know, he is the guy who is credited for inventing the internet and yes, I had to look up his name because "Sir Tim" does not due the internet man justice. What is it that the most under credited man that I can think of hates himself for? Well, assuming that he is active the internet and on Facebook, it would be this, the list of some of the 18 most annoying people on Facebook. Take a moment now and scroll through the slide show while looking at the Livefeed on your account, you will see that these archetypes fit pretty easily, some even for yourself (I secretly wish I could pull off #3.) The moral of this story being that as those of us who started with MySpace in the 7th grade mature to Facebook and beyond in life, we have realized that without the internet, a lot of the annoying things that people do would have gone unnoticed unless we spent serious time with that person (which I doubt that most of you could do with the 200+ people you have accepted the friend request from.)
-COBRA COMMANDER
-COBRA COMMANDER
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
March 9, 2010, Lindsey Lohan's lawyers announce that she will be suing E*Trade over the "Milkahalic" Super Bowl commercial. As a result, our economy plunges even deeper into the toilet, Iran launches missiles at Israel prompting the beginning of what may become WWIII and families are fleeing the suburbs in fear of nuclear annihilation. Actually, none of this happens because nobody cares, Lindsey Lohan isn't important, that ad was funny for about three days and I can’t even come up with a third thing because this is such a stupid (yes, stupid) case. I feel bad for the entire courtroom staff who has to take part on this case and for those who are stuck defending E*Trade. According to Tim Nudd of Adweek.com "This is awesome. The New York Post reports that Lindsay Lohan is suing E*Trade for $100 million, claiming that the boyfriend-stealing "milkaholic" named Lindsay in the company's Super Bowl commercial above from Grey Advertising was clearly modeled after her." Representatives at Grey Advertising, responsible for this ad, claim that their copy writers only chose a popular girl's baby name and the rest was only inferred by Lohan. This sounds oddly similar to a high school cafeteria incident where someone mentions the word "fat" or something else derogatory and the chubby girl at the next table turns around and snaps "I am not fat" without hearing the rest of the sentence which was about the fat content of potato chips. Come on guys, be adults and keep your lawyers back in their pens.
- COBRA COMMANDER
- COBRA COMMANDER
Response to Mr. French
As someone who may spend the rest of his life coming up with shiny new ways to catch peoples attention, Alex French's (GQ.com) review of Sexually, I'm More of a Switzerland by David Rose has proved to be an unorthodox source of inspiration when trying to come up with ideas. The book is a compilation of various personal ads from British newspapers from over the years and an infinite source of different ways to sell a product (being the person itself.) Mr. French's Q&A was cute but to be honest, I barely understood what I read, I was far too excited about the book. As I type this I am ordering the book online and while I'm at it, your picture was a bit out of focus Mr. French.
- COBRA COMMANDER
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